Depression, Anxiety and Stress. Few of us avoid the impact of this trio in our modern day lives. Unfortunately, they all have us viewing life through a negative lens and predicting the worst. We filter our environment looking for evidence that supports our negative predictions and ignore or brush off what doesn’t fit (the gratitude moments). We focus, almost obsessively, on what goes wrong and fail to pay attention to what goes right in our lives. This focus on the negative sets us up for depression and anxiety – and the cycle continues. Our low or anxious mood has us focussing on finding supporting evidence for these negatives. Resulting in us often feeling more depressed or anxious.
To add to this, humans tend to be quite pessimistic and focus on the negative that surrounds them. It makes sense from an evolutionary viewpoint and can in fact be critical in our survival. The challenge in creating our own happiness may be strongly linked to our ability to overcome our natural persuasion toward pessimism. That is to, consciously and actively pursue opportunities to be grateful.
The act of gratitude can make for a happier and more satisfying life. One theory suggests that gratitude moves people to consciously identify and reflect on positive experiences, which in turn leads you to experience more positive emotions and develop and maintain relationships, making you happier. When you feel gratitude, there is a positive benefit that can lead to lasting happiness.
Three common ways people can express their gratitude:
- By being gracious of your past (i.e., think of positive childhood memories)
- By being gracious for the present (i.e., taking time to be present and enjoy)
- By being grateful for what’s to come (i.e., hopeful and optimistic of the future)
Consider the possible benefits for you in practising gratitude. Research shows that the more someone is thankful or feels gratitude, the less there is time or room for negative thoughts. While as I said earlier, we tend to naturally be quite pessimistic, it is quite a task to be both negative (pessimistic) and positive (optimistic) at the same time. Attuning to and savouring moments of pleasure or success that we experience, reduces our focus on mundane, negative or stressful moments in your day. Taking action to include gratitude in your day as a planned activity can have far reaching advantages.
Practising gratitude as a regular activity can also improve your self-confidence. It is important to determine not only what you are grateful for but also the why. The why is two pronged. Why am I grateful for X, as well as why did it happen – what part did I play in the event, action, relationship etc for this to occur. Truly understanding all of the elements in your gratitude (what, why and why) adds to your confidence and hopefulness for a positive future. You develop greater belief in how effective you are at this thing called life, becoming the driver rather than a passenger in your own journey.
Moments of gratitude do not have to be monumental. In fact, it’s the small stuff that we should focus on. Look for what went good today and then consider why it happened – write it down. It is important to create a physical record of your moments of gratitude – memory fades but there is a positive benefit from being able to look back at all of your written moments of gratitude.
Try this challenge for a few weeks. Write about at least one moment of gratitude each night – the what and the why. There is a free worksheet under our Resources tab that can help you to get started – the Gratitude Journal worksheet. It may be a little awkward at first, but it will get easier with practise. The chances are that you will feel happier – less depressed and anxious – as a result.
The research suggests that gratitude is strongly and consistently associated with greater happiness – that a biological explanation exists. That regular positive thoughts and reactions to life’s challenges, is observable in brain scans. Optimistic thoughts calm and soothe the amygdala, the part of the brain that sounds the stress alarm. Optimism also lowers the stress hormone cortisol, releases pleasure-inducing neurotransmitters, and activates the parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for rest and relaxation.
Having realistic expectations, rather than taking extremely positive or negative positions, may actually be the recipe for sustainable good health and happiness. It’s not the presence of optimism, but rather the absence of pessimism that have actually been associated with better health. So, rather than aiming for constant joy and happiness, or fatalistically giving in to an overall negative outlook, the goal should be to moderate – avoid either extreme.
Take the gratitude challenge and feel the difference for yourself!!
How to Access a Psychologist at CQ Psych Services:
- Contact us directly by calling 07 49726929 or email admin@cqpsychservices.com.au
- Ask your GP or health professional to refer you to our clinic.
- Visit our website and complete a ‘Contact Us’ form and one of our friendly staff will reply to your enquiry. Website: https://cqpsychservices.com.au/
Author: Suzie Humphrey